1) You’ve been in the desert, so to speak, for over a year.
2) Aspirin protects against oxidative damage, which you’ve had enough of.
3) Exercise-induced (or nothing-induced) muscle pain makes you want to pull your hair out, and then you remember you have little to pull out.
4) You’ve put up with your DNA punishing you for the toxic assault your chemo was, for long enough.
5) This dynamic and charming trio (exercise intolerance, pain, fatigue) has resulted in a closet full of clothes that is no longer in any way useful.
6) Looming on the calendar in a few short weeks is a party at which you know you will have to see your ex-husband (and his wife, who used to be your close friend), and you no longer have a choice about the exercise, pain or no pain.
7) It, aspirin, inhibits abnormal cell division, which you’ve had your fill of.
8) It protects against immune suppression, which you’ve had your fill of also.
9) It protects against stroke, which isn’t exactly on your bucket list.
10) It activates T3, another of the many hormones your chemo has tampered with.
11) It protects against dopamine toxicity, which you’re not at risk for, but just feel like taking extra precautions against.
12) It stimulates mitochondrial respiration—carbon dioxide production rather than excessive lactic acid production, the latter being the reason exercise makes you want to pull out that hair you have so little of.